Before the release of Dev D in 2009, Abhay Deol made an unexpected move—he left Bollywood at the peak of his career and relocated to New York. His departure was brief, as he returned to India soon after the film’s success. In a recent interview, Abhay opened up about his decision to step away from acting, revealing that he struggled with the fame that came with being a public figure.
During the interview, Abhay shared that he had difficulty dealing with attention and recognition. “I was finding it hard to deal with the attention and fame because I started getting flashbacks of when I was a kid. I was a sensitive child and I didn’t like the attention. I liked the art, creativity and medium. I knew that Dev D was going to be big, but I didn’t want to be famous. But at the same time, I wanted to act.”
He further elaborated on the internal conflict he faced, admitting, “There was a conflict within me. I focused a lot on the negatives. I hadn’t resolved many issues, so I just ran away because I was afraid of being famous and everything that came with it.”
Moving to New York, however, did not bring him the peace he had hoped for. Instead, the actor found himself spiraling into a self-destructive phase. Looking back, he acknowledged that he knew his time there wouldn’t last because he was simply indulging. “When I went there, I knew it wasn’t going to be forever because I was just indulging. I was very destructive. Some actors take their work home. It’s a process to learn how not to be affected. I am not now. I don’t take my work home. You should just embrace the privilege of being an actor and stop taking yourself so seriously. But, that didn’t happen at the end of that year. If anything, I got more and more destructive as the year progressed,” he admitted.
Abhay eventually made the decision to return to India, realizing that his time in New York was not sustainable. He described his experience there as mirroring the character he played in Dev D—drinking, not working, and carelessly spending money. “I knew I wasn’t going to stay there. I was just in New York playing the part I played in Dev D, getting drunk, not working and being terrible with my money. It was a waste in that sense. I won’t call it a waste now because I learnt something, but it was destructive. I wanted to come back home and continue to earn and support myself and my family. There are responsibilities, you have to come back. This is a make-believe world. I knew it wasn’t going to be permanent, it was a temporary escape.”
Abhay’s journey reflects the struggles many actors face in navigating fame and personal identity. While his time away was turbulent, it ultimately led to self-realization and a renewed sense of responsibility.
